Thursday, January 26th

155.)

My semester was starting to ramp up and I had real assignments due. I had some harder classes this semester, because I wanted to get this whole school thing over with as soon as possible. I had at least a year and a half left, and my advisor said I had to choose a major by the end of the term. I still had no idea.

To make matters worse, every ounce of free time was spent thinking about Academy Works. About Maria and Judith. About their dynamic, and what made them interesting. I still had no idea.

It was Thursday when Lin came over. She was a huge distraction, and not in a good way. I needed to look at majors. I needed to think about Academy M. What I didn't need was her saddling me with more obligations.

"So when do I get to meet Blossom?" Lin asked.

"I don't know... eventually."

"We could get dinner tomorrow?"

"I work until one. I have class until four. I have therapy at six."

"The weekend?" Lin asked.

"I'm at the beach house."

"Then I'll come to the beach house with you," Lin said cheerily. My blood ran cold.

"No... I don't..."

"It's a joke, Amanda," Lin laughed. "I'm not going to impose on your weekends away with your girlfriend."

Girlfriend was still a weird term. It felt more specific than partner, and that stressed me out. But she was a girl, and we were dating. It was bound to come up.

"What's got you so wound up?" Lin asked.

"School. Writing."

"Need a tutor?" Lin winked.

"We wouldn't do any tutoring if you were my tutor," I said plainly. "And no. I have to pick a major."

"Do computer science with me," Lin shrugged. All the while, she was playing a game on the TV. I was skimming the school's website. We barely looked at each other while we spoke.

"Computers are not a strong point of mine. I have a Mac for a reason."

"English?" Lin offered. "You like writing."

"Yeah, and I'll sing that Avenue Q song whenever someone asks what I'm doing with my life."

"Mm. Well, I don't think I'm your girl to solve this problem. What about the writing one? Can I help with that?"

Lin had literally never asked that question in our entire friendship. Was she dying?

"Uh... no. It's just a character dilemma."

"I know video game archetypes pretty well."

That was true. She did. But I couldn't balance on the tightrope of talking about my smutty diaper stories with my best friend. Not right now.

"I'll get back to you," I sighed. "I just need time to think..."

"Or, you could play this game with me. Second controller is in my bag."

"No, I'm alright."

"Really, Amanda," Lin urged. "You might just need a break. If you think about something all the time, you're just going to run in circles."

"I'm just going to be anxious doing something else right now."

"Suit yourself," Lin relented.

But I really wished I took Lin's advice.

"So about my meet-up with Blossom..."

***

"So about our hang-out with Amanda." Becky was eating the olive off the end of a toothpick. Her drink didn't come with an olive; she just wanted a few for the table.

"What about it?" Blossom asked.

"Don't be stupid. You keep saying 'oh all of us can hang out together,' blah blah blah. But you never make concrete plans. You want me to like this girl, right? She's important to you, right? Well, then I have to actually see her once in a while."

"Yeah I guess so," Blossom relented. She deflated a bit, but not for any rational reason. "She's pretty shy, and I think the sorority house stresses her the fuck out."

"Doesn't have to be at home," Becky said. "Wanna go to a club? Nah, she's not a party girl... a movie? No talking though. Maybe just dinner? Everyone eats, right? Well, everyone should."

"We could maybe do dinner, yeah. But nowhere grody."

"Hey!"

"Don't even pretend, Becks; you love dive bars and greasy spoons. If we're going out, we're going somewhere nice."

"Fine. I don't care. You pick the menu, the venue, the seating. Just make sure to bring your girlfriend."

"Partner," Blossom corrected.

"Same difference."

"And you be nice to her, okay?" Blossom pursed her lips, expecting a fight, but Becky surprised her with a response she didn't expect.

"Jesus Blossom, she's not a fucking baby, alright? She can take care of herself, you don't need to keep telling me to use the kid gloves."

"Right, but..."

"But if we are going to be friends, then perhaps we should actually get to know each other? It's cute that you're so protective, but I'm fine. And I'm fine with the two of you."

Blossom gave Becky a skeptical look.

"I actually am!" Becky defended herself. "You've been giving me more time recently. I feel closer to you again. And last night was... ya know. Nice." Fooling around had started with "kissing to attract guys at a bar", but it had become a lot more private.

"She's just... she's fragile sometimes, that's all. And like you know how much I love you, Becks; but you and me, we're pretty confident people. She's spent her whole life having people treat her like shit, so she's always pretty guarded. And I don't want you thinking she doesn't like you, and it's just... argh."

Blossom wasn't going to get anywhere running herself in circles.

"Fuck it. Alright, you got it. But if you and her don't like each other because I didn't stand in-between, it's gonna suck for me. And you love me. So don't make it suck for me."

"You worry way too much." At the end of the day, Becky knew that Blossom's fears were irrational. But she also knew where they came from. This was the first time Becky really got to mix spheres with anyone else in Blossom's life; she hadn't even met Blossom's dad before! So Becky decided to prove that she knew how to use kid gloves.

"It's gonna be okay," Becky encouraged.

"I know. I trust you. I trust her. It's just hard for me, because all I can think about is what can go wrong and all the trust in the world doesn't make anxiety go away."

This kind of vulnerability was not a well-known Blossom Brixley trait. It actually made her feel a kinship with Amy.

"I can't promise everything will go perfectly," Becky said soothingly. "But it'll be okay in the end. We'll get along fine. The worst thing that happens is we just don't vibe, I swear. I'll respect her, because I respect you."

"Thanks, Becks. I'm pretty lucky to have you, and I don't say that enough."

"You sure don't," Becky winked.