Chapter Seven:

I think we were halfway into the second movie when I fell asleep. The lights were off, the blinds were drawn, and I fumbled out of bed automatically. My feet went to the bathroom and I turned on the light. I went to pull down my pajama pants, but I wasn't wearing any. Just a diaper. Diaper... diaper... I rubbed my eyes and tried to piece it all together. Finally, I went back out into the hotel room and shook Jackie awake.

"Hey... am I allowed to use the bathroom?" It was a practical question. What were the rules? But it sounded like I was asking for permission.

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Huh. What. Where was I? These aren't my glasses. I grumbled and sat up in bed, trying to get a sense of where I was, where we were. My thigh was warm... and I remembered the sounds of her diaper crinkling against me as she fell asleep. Oh, right. Leona. What was the line in that song? Oh there comes gravity? I yawned and shrugged my shoulders. "Abe didn't say, but I bet that Betsy will want to change you first thing and if you're already wet, you won't have to do it in front of her and the camera crew."

"Mm..." I rubbed my eyes again and tried to shake the sleepiness. I looked over at the clock, but it was still only five in the morning. Three more hours until Betsy arrived? I couldn't hold it that long...

"Anyway," Jackie muttered sleepily, "no one brought extra diapers."

They just thought of everything, didn't they? I sulked.

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"Come on, get back in here with me before I wake up too much; you're super cuddly when you sleep and I've been spoiled now." I yawned, and even with my red hair all a mess, there was always something about the way my face reflected the ambient light at night time - my pale skin, and the freckles like stars of their own - that people couldn't help but be captivated by. Leona didn't seem all that immune to it.

"Come on, Leona." It almost felt strange NOT to call her Baby Luvs.

"...for the record, I think this is stupid." But all the same, I climbed into bed with my caretaker. That was what she was, wasn't it? A glorified babysitter. But when she wrapped her arms around me and I rested my forehead against her chest... well, I guess it wasn't so bad. I was just about to doze off when the need to use the bathroom woke me up again. I whimpered and kicked at the blankets. I had to pee!

"Shh..." So, I don't know. I was half asleep. I think I meant to reach for her pacifier on the clip on her shirt, I think that's what I was trying to do - to get it and to push it between her lips and calm her down. Not because I was all that good a babysitter, but because I was tired dammit! Anyway, that's not that happened. Instead I somehow managed instead to slip my thumb between her lips. And before I could take it back, she calmed down.

I'd always been used to pacifiers. I sucked on them instinctively on set. Blame my oral fixation or my professional choices, but either way, when Jackie slid her thumb between my lips, I was too tired to do anything but suck. A minute later, as I drifted off to sleep, I had to pee. Calm and exhaustion was getting the best of me though. So I fell back asleep into a short, silly dream...

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I don't think either of us were awake when it happened, when Leona's bladder became Baby Luvs' instead. Maybe I felt the warmth against my thigh, but I was on the edge of awake and asleep anyway - I'd never have noticed more than a faint sensation. All I knew was that when I woke up to the early morning sun shining past the thin set curtains behind her crib, rays that reached as far as the bed we both lay in, I had the most attractive girl I'd ever seen, cuddled up to me, sucking my thumb.

I did my best not to disturb her, which wasn't too difficult - part of me wanted this moment to last forever. Like a photo. Speaking of which, and with practiced grace, I retrieved my camera from the bedside with my one free hand, and took a few more pictures. And even though she was mostly just a cute face framed with messy hair at this point,.she looked so at peace with my thumb between her lips. I would have gotten some video, too... but... well... fuck Abe. This moment was mine.

"Mm....."

"You have to eat breakfast, remember?"

"Mm...."

"You're a huge pest to wake up, you know that?"

"Mm......" Finally the blankets were pulled off me and I closed my eyes tighter at the overwhelming cold. I cuddled up to the pillow in nothing but my t-shirt and very wet diaper, hiding from the morning sun. "Sleepy..."

"And you'll be even sleepier when your Mom-from-Hell gets here and only want to let you have formula all day, won't you?" It amazed me how much effort it took; how careful I'd been not to wake her, when I could have done just about anything and she wouldn't have stirred. Good to know for future use.

"Come up, up you get, if you hurry we can get room service before anybody gets here, but if you dawdle we'll have to go down in person for it, and I'm not sure my little Tinkle Bell here wants to do that, right?" It was... weird, that she wet herself. I mean, thats what babies did, so I guess it couldn't be considered too strange. Maybe it was weird that I found it charming. But now, hours after the fact, when she was just a soggy little girl who smelled of pee, it was admittedly a little less charming. But only a little. I flicked open my phone to capture some of her groggy responses, though, because I guess I had to have something to give Abe.

I sat on the floor by the bed and ate french toast sticks, still sleepy and half-asleep. But Jackie said it was important, and the clock was ticking. She lowered the railing to the crib and helped me inside, belly full and diaper wet, before raising it again. When had I wet myself exactly? I remembered that dream, but... I never wet the bed. Never. Still, the second my head hit the pillow inside that crib, I fell right to sleep.

I checked the clock and made sure I had the time, and then stepped into the shower to freshen up before the day was due to begin. And in between each moment, before the shower, after, even while I stood on the balcony to dry my hair in the crisp morning air, I took clips of Baby Luvs asleep in her crib. Being a photographer had its merits - the way I adjusted the lighting and exposure sold the videos as being all through the night, which I was sure Abe would love. Especially her obviously sodden diaper. By the time the knock came on the door - three quick raps - I figured I'd earned my keep.

"Good morning." I yawned, and surprisingly Betsy pushed a Starbucks cup between my fingers with a respectful smile. Okay. Didn't expect that. She walked past me, the camera crew in tow, and approached the crib, giving directions the whole time to the men. There was something about Nurse Betsy that made her feel... I don't know, like a force of nature and not quite like a person at all. Like she was a Hurricane and you just couldn't fight that. I wondered if it was her all encompassing presence that made me feel protective over Leona...? Or was I just feeling things I'd never felt before? Whatever, Jackie. Drama queen.

"Good morning sweet girl."

Before I could even get my bearings, Betsy had pulled me up into her strong arms. I looked deliriously at her, at the cameras, trying to figure out what was going on. I was a damn good actress, but I couldn't have faked that if I tried! I rubbed my eyes and whimpered sleepily.

"Oh, look how sleepy she is, don't you worry little one, Mommy is here to get you all ready for the day." Her hand squeezed the seat of the diaper as she looked at the cameras. "As you all can see, Baby Luvs rarely ever wakes up dry - she's been training as a bedwetter for just as long as she can remember. In-fact, those mornings she -does- wake up dry just make her cry like the little baby she is."

As the cameraman circled, focused on the wet undergarment, Betsy continued her trite monologue. God, she was like some super villain in a spy film!

"She probably wet this... two or three times, I would guess from the weight of it, and as you can see from her tired eyes, she didn't wake up for even one of them. It's her dream to one day find a strong Daddy figure to take care of her, to fall asleep against the chest of, to suck on his thumb when she's sad. Maybe it'll be one of you, her adoring fans?"

Jesus. Did she have a camera in here?! I was glad the camera wasn't on me, because fuck was I blushing. A Daddy? Was that what I was? Auntie Jackie: Big Strong Arms To Cuddle In. I didn't say a damn word.

Fall asleep on his chest? Suck his thumb when I'm sad? My thoughts immediately went to one person, but when I looked over at her, she was staring down at her shoes. She looked a bit red, too... but I didn't have time for that. The Daddy angle. Great publicity! So I hugged Betsy around the neck just the same and pushed my face into her neck.

"I gots da best Mommy! But Daddys are special to widdle girls like me..." A wistful sigh and a pout. Perfect.

"That's true, little peach, maybe one day you'll even have both, wouldn't that be lovely?"

Yeah, like hell I'd ever share her with Betsy. You know, not that she was mine or anything. I shut my dumb thoughts up and just took pictures. Betsy laid her down on the edge of the bed. I moved up close to get some pictures of the diaper changing, but with every click I was less and less sure if they were for Abe or for me.

After the first time, diaper changes weren't really that big a deal. Blush, look shy, play with my fingers or with my stuffed animals. The usual. Routine, almost, though this was only the second time. It was strange how easily all this was coming to me... wetting my diapers, letting a woman change me, acting out like a full-time little girl. More and more, it felt like Leona was further out of reach. And the weird thing? I didn't even mind.