Chapter Twenty-Two

“Lavender? You okay?”

“Mhm,” I replied weakly and nodded my head, but I wasn’t really.

Sharp pain shot through my lower abdomen. I had done a little too good of a job shoving my need to pee to the back of my brain and now it was coming back with a vengeance.

This was always the end game, wasn’t it?

It was, but…

But what?

But I was having second thoughts now that the moment was upon me, not least of all because Vivian had just shared something really special and intimate. Too bad it was a little too late for second thoughts. That fact became painfully obvious as another wave of fresh pain passed through me and my panties grew damp.

“Are you sure?” Vivian was asking, but she seemed far away.

Why are you even bothering to fight it? This is what you were waiting for; you literally thought about peeing your pants as a distraction just minutes ago, and now you’re having second thoughts?

Why was I fighting it? I took a deep breath, said a small prayer that I wasn’t make a huge mistake, and stopped fighting it. This was easier said than done; it was an effort of sheer willpower to stop fighting it—potty training is engraved in our brain like that—but I had a lot of practice. My body took over almost immediately, and the crotch and seat of my shortalls quickly became soaked.

I looked up at Vivian and put on my best mix of worried and afraid.

“Lavender?” Vivian’s face contorted into confused concern as she put the spoon down and began approaching me. “What’s wrong, darling?”

I couldn’t have answered her no matter how much I wanted to; I felt completely frozen. My bladder was still emptying itself, and all I could do was sit there. Fortunately, I didn’t need to answer her. The sound of pee dripping off the stool and splashing to the ground answered for me.

Vivian looked down at the floor, then back up at me, her face softening. “Oh, Lavender,” she said, clearly at a bit of a loss.

“I’m sorry,” I blurted out at last as the stream tapered off to a trinkle and then nothing. “I’m so sorry, Vivian,” I didn’t realize I was crying until I tasted the salty tears on my lips. “I…I just had to go so badly all of the sudden and…and…” My words trailed off. All I could do was look at Vivian helplessly. Her face was so gentle and kind, but also so full of pity. It was too much, the dam broke and the tears turned into full-on sobs. The accident may have been contrived, but the panic and fear and the tears were all real. Not to mention the shame.

“Lavender, darling, sweetheart,” Vivian crossed the small space between us in the blink of an eye and hugged me, holding me close to her chest, and began slowly stroking the back of my head as I cried into her chest. “It’s really okay, my little Lavender, everything is okay, all right? We’re going to get you all cleaned up and sorted out, okay?”

“Okay,” I muttered through snot and tears. I was honestly a little surprised at myself for crying so much, but the look of pity on Vivian’s face had been too much for me. But maybe I just felt ashamed over how misplaced the pity was.

We stayed like that for a long time, Vivian holding me while she stroked my hair and made soft, reassuring noises while I focused on my breathing and tried to calm down. Eventually, the tears dried up.

“Here,” Vivian said softly as she grabbed some nearby paper towels, “I know these are kind of rough, but let’s try to get your face cleaned up a little, okay?” I nodded as Vivian went to work wiping tears and snot off my face. She stopped short of blowing my nose for me, instead handing me a fresh paper towel when she was done and instructing me to blow my nose.

“I’m so sorry,” I repeated, completely and utterly at a lose for what else to say or do. This had been my end-game; it had been impossible for me to effectively plan for what came next since so much hinged on Vivian’s reaction. I was rudderless now, drifting in unknown waters, my only certainty was where the currents were taking me…at least, I hoped I knew.

“That’s enough apologies,” Vivian said softly but sternly, “I won’t have you feeling guilty or bad for things you can’t help, okay? It was just an accident, and everything is okay.”

Ouch, right in the guilty conscience.

I nodded and sniffled, resisting the urge to start crying all over again out of sheer guilt.

“Fortunately,” Vivian said, her voice lightening up, “you have plenty of clothes with you, so we can get you changed, and I can toss these clothes in the laundry and have them ready to be packed in your suitcase by tomorrow morning before we leave, okay?”

“Okay,” I nodded again.

“Okay,” Vivian smiled reassuringly at me and took my hand, “do you want to take a bath?”

I shook my head, “I think maybe just a quick shower?”

“That’s a lovely idea,” Vivian squeezed my hand and started leading me out of the kitchen and towards the upstairs bathroom. “You can just go ahead and get yourself all cleaned up and into some fresh clothes. By the time your done, dinner will be almost ready, all right?”

I simply nodded and allowed myself to be lead upstairs and back to the bathroom I had cleaned myself up in after so many accidents already. When we arrived, Vivian, like she usually did, started the water for me, adjusting the knob until she decided the water was hot enough, the only difference this time being that instead of plugging the tub and allowing it to fill when she had found the right temperature, she pulled the plunger that switched the water from the faucet to the shower head. I stood there awkwardly watching her in silence the whole time. When she was done, I expected her to leave as she usually did with instructions for me leave my clothes in the hallway, but instead she turned to me and gave me a quizzical look.

“Okay!” She said brightly, her confusion seeming to dissipate quickly. She closed the distance between us and started undoing the clasps on my shortalls. “Let’s go ahead and get you out of these.”

My cheeks turned a new shade of red, but I bit my lip and let her continue.

You can’t just let her peel you out of pissy clothes!

And can’t I?

Because…it’s…embarrassing?

More so than pissing myself in her kitchen?

“There we go,” Vivian said as she undid the second clasp and let the shortall fall to the floor around my ankles. “Oops,” Vivian said looking down,” I guess we should have taken your shoes off first, huh Lavender?” She gave me a playful smile and bent down to start untying my high-tops.

This is so awkward, shouldn’t you like…say something?

Say what?

Anything!

But I was at a complete loss. I simply stood there in my t-shirt and wet panties, my shortalls around my ankles, as Vivian untied and removes my shoes and socks. “Okay,” she said when she was down, “step out!” I followed her directions and stepped out of my sodden shortalls.

“Now, arms up!” She said with a smile as she stood back up and grabbed the hem of my shirt. I blushed as I complied, and for the first time since this little undressing routine had started, a shy smile graced my lips. “There’s a smile,” Vivian said as she dropped my shirt in a pile with the rest of my clothes and pinched my cheek. “Are you feeling a little better now that you’re almost out of those icky clothes?”

Icky? That’s not the kind of word Vivian would usually use…

It wasn’t, but I just smiled and nodded, “um, I can…do the rest…” I offered with a blush, secretly hoping she’d turn it down.

“Don’t be so bashful,” she dismissed my offer with a wave of her hand before reaching around my torso to unbuckle my bra, “it’s not like this is the first time I’ve undressed you.”

“I know, but…it’s…different…”

“I guess a little,” she dropped my bra into the pile and hooked her thumbs in the waistband of my panties, “but let me take care of my little Lavender, okay?”

Okay, Miss Vivian.

“Okay…Vivian,” I blushed almost as hard as if I had said the whole thought out loud, then added a polite but subdued, “thank you.”

“You’re quite welcome, darling,” Vivian said as she gathered up my clothes in her arms. “Shall I grab something from your suitcase for you to change into?”

I nodded my head, “yes, please.”

With assurances that she would be right back with fresh clothes, Vivian finally left, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

Well, that went…pretty well?

Define “pretty well.”

I set about trying to find a hair tie to keep my hair from getting wet in the shower and quickly found one in the vanity above the sink. With my hair tied up, I climbed into the shower and set about cleaning the pee of my skin.

Well, it wasn’t worst-case scenario.

I have to admit, it was not.

And she undressed you, like a toddler.

I could feel my whole-body blush as I thought about it again. Then I blushed deeper as I realized Vivian was going to have to go into my suitcases to get clothes. The suitcases where my diapers and pull-ups are.

Maybe she’ll bring you a pull-up instead of panties. Maybe she’ll see them in your suitcase and realize they are the much more appropriate undergarment for a girl as little as you are.

“Now, sweetheart,” I imagined Vivian saying as she came back into the bathroom holding a pile of my clothes with a pull-up on top, “I don’t want you to fuss about this, okay? But your accidents are getting a little out of control, and I think it’s time we put you back in pull-ups, okay?”

As I showered, I played through variations of that scenario, resisting the urge to do more than just imagine them. When I was finished a few minutes later, I pulled back the shower curtain to find a small pile of my clothes sitting on the sink. Vivian had, apparently, slipped in and out of the bathroom without me noticing.

I couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed by the pair of panties sitting on top.