Gwen
"May the sun shine on your face, Gwen Silver. I have heard tell that you have need of me?"
It was so strange to hear the wolf’s voice on the phone. Where the River Crashes Upon the Rocks was old and disliked technology. Lily had been surprised when I called, but she hadn’t questioned me when I said it was urgent that I talk to River.
Over the years, many awkward conversations had passed between the old Packleader and me. Odd questions from one or the other of us, mine about wolf culture, hers about human technology and motivation. This one wasn’t just awkward though. If I messed this conversation up, I could endanger a ten year friendship that meant the world to me.
"Hey River." Definitely the smoothest opening I could have given. "I have a bit of a long story. A very complicated one. To make it as simple... I might have a Trueborn human in my basement that I thought was a loner. She was doing very little to hide herself. Doesn't seem to know a lot about werewolves. Turns out she has a pack and I'm probably looking at my house getting attacked in the next few days."
Silence was the worst thing I could hear from the phone. My brain spun nearly out of control, expecting her to shout, to chastise me, maybe even hang up on me. The silence was terrifying.
When she finally spoke, her normally calm voice that spoke with the wisdom and serenity of nature sounded clipped. I couldn’t tell if she was frustrated, scared, angry, or some mix. Trueborn wolves were often much harder to read.
"Packleaders have names. Which pack have you?"
"That's not a piece of information I've managed to get a hold of yet." I sighed, realizing how little I really knew I was up against. "What I know is the werewolf I have is named Victoria, goes by Tori. Female Packleader, though Tori calls her the alpha, I haven’t gotten any names. She's been with the pack for four years and they haven't taught her things that seem really basic. I burned her with silver and she thought I was a witch, River. Four years and her pack didn't tell her she was weak to silver."
Where the River Crashes Upon the Rocks did not interrupt me, despite the chaotic feel of her name - which had supposedly been very true many years ago - she was a creature of gentle thoughtfulness.
It made her next question cut so much deeper.
"We cannot know the whys of the past without knowing the who of the present. In that absence you can tell me the why of the present, yes? Are you the hunter now?"
"No, River. I don't want to be a hunter.” Tiny claws of panic pulled at my chest. Had I cost myself one of the most important things to me in the world? Summers without my friends sounded desolate. I’d barely gotten to know Juliette. I wanted to see Lily grow. I loved them. Desperation tinged my voice as I attempted to defend my choices. “What I was faced with was what appeared to be a lone werewolf doing very little to hide that fact." Anxiety moved my body as I talked, pacing back and forth until I decided to crack a beer. I needed something to calm my nerves. "I goaded her, things that shouldn’t set off a werewolf just passing through. She got aggressive immediately and transformed into her brute form in the middle of the street."
Tori had been nothing but red flags. A hunter would have backed off, tracked her back to her den. The entire pack could have died from her choices. River listened, even as I paused. She waited, as if she knew there was more to it.
"I'll admit that I grabbed her backpack after she ran off. I was hoping I could get her to talk to me if I had it. Instead she tracked me, jumped into the back of my truck, then broke through my front door. She broke into my home, River. I tranquilized her and moved her to my basement to figure out what her deal was. It was the least violent option I had available."
Finally, her voice held the soft tones that I needed. I nearly wept from relief. "Your choices are understood. I am glad to hear you do not wish to be a hunter, it would make talking more difficult between us. Without knowing which pack the pup belongs to, I cannot advise you. Your best choice is to let the pup go and run. We will give you shelter, or Smoke can."
I took a sip of my beer and took a few moments to collect my thoughts. Part of me was hoping for some other kind of advice. An idea, any idea of how to talk to the pack that was probably searching for my place right then.
"I was afraid you were going to say that." The empty bottle clattered against the trash can from my toss. "I'm concerned how she's been treated. How in the dark she is, how little she knows. I can't imagine she'll be treated any better when she gets back to her pack. And..."
I caught myself before I let the feelings spill. I wasn't sure if I should really be honest. I wasn't really sure I knew what River's views were on relationships, I had never really considered one with any of her pack. For all I knew, she might hate the idea of me being with a wolf.
Despite that, I knew I needed to be honest. There was no point in reaching out to River if I was going to lie and hide information.
"... I like her. And I'm going to be sad when she goes."
I was lifted, gently, her voice cupping me. "Some pack leaders keep their wolves from knowings to keep order. The pack leader is probably hungry for dominance. If the two of you wish to be mates, either you must be accepted into the pack - unlikely as you cannot get the wolf with pups, or she you. The other choice is for her to renounce her pack and make you her pack. The human story calls you Romeo, yes?"
She wasn’t rejecting me. She wasn’t trying to tell me I was stupid, or crazy. River was trying to help. I felt my face burn when she mentioned Tori ‘getting with pups’. Tori had used the same word, when she had been struggling.
Mates.
I had known the pack long enough to know that a werewolf’s mate was a complicated thing.
Still, River was considering me as a valid mate for her, just like that. Despite everything, she had put a smile on my face.
"I'd like to believe it's more than tragic teenage love, but I guess that isn't unfair. Given the circumstances most other comparisons might be much darker."
My mind raced with the possibilities. I'd be lying if I said I'd never thought about what it would be like to be a werewolf, one of the pack. I never learned the exact mechanics of how it worked. I wasn't even sure just anyone could become one. I seemed to lack the sixth sense that most humans seemed to, the one that made them fearful and cruel to the wolves. I couldn’t help but wonder if that lack might affect my chances.
I took a deep breath before continuing, trying to settle the maelstrom inside me. "So you’re saying my choices are to let her go and hide, or see if she'll renounce her pack." Tori had already said she was loyal because her alpha had saved her from something. "Both hurt, but I guess I'll have to choose one tonight. I don't know who her alpha is, but I have a feeling that I'm not going to best a Trueborn in real combat."
"If you wish to take her in combat, you can demand the Rite of Packleader, but that is fought without weapons, you will not win. If you choose weapons, you will have to kill the entire pack, and you cannot be friend to my pack if you do this. Her Packleader, alpha is not... " River struggled. English was frustrating for her, she said that English was smelling food instead of tasting it. "...a good word for this. Leading a pack in times of peace is different. Her Packleader must release her, or the pup must renounce her pack. You cannot take her by strength and remain wolffriend."
"I understand, River. Thank you for advising me. You and your pack have been important friends to me for a very long time. I don't want to do anything to lose that." I sighed again and flopped down in my chair. "She feels indebted to them because her Packleader did something to help her. I don't think she's going to choose me over them. I... think I don't have a choice but to let her go."
It hurt. Saying it out loud made it real in a way it hadn’t been before. Speaking the words, admitting it, broke my heart. I had cried so little in years. I had shed very few tears since Granddad’s passing.
Now my cheeks were wet again. This foolish, dangerous, arrogant, beautiful werewolf had stolen my heart. She’d take a piece with her when she left. I hadn’t felt the way Tori made me feel in a long, long time. I hadn’t expected to ever feel it again, here in my patch of nowhere. A small woman with flipflops in the winter had turned my world sideways and I wasn’t sure I’d ever recover.
River was consoling. Kind, with that faint touch of sorrow to her. "Then you are at the mercy of the Packleader. Human mates can join the pack in some times. But as I spoke, it is unlikely since you two cannot produce pups. You can ask, but if they believe you took their packmate by force... the pup has to signal them that she is safe."
"I understand." River had given me a lot to think about. Did I want to leave this life to be a human companion to a pack? Deep down I knew I wanted Tori here with me. Could she really be happy here though? "Your wisdom is a gift that I thank you for, Where the River Crashes Upon the Rocks, and I treasure the friendship we have. I'm going to weigh my options, but I'm going to let her go tomorrow at the very least."
I was about to say goodbye and hang up when an unfortunate thought occurred to me.
"Oh, one last thing." I felt awkward bringing this up, but who knew if I'd be here when they came back. It was a sobering thought. "I don't have any relatives left. If something happens to me I want you to know my property has been willed to Lily since she's the only one of you that I know has an established human identity. It's for you and the pack. You'd need someone to clear out the property of silver, but it'll be yours if you want it. Don't have to take it if you don't though."
"I will tell Riggs, this is not a thing I understand. Your concept of land as property.... “ It was a source of frustration for her, I knew, but she let it drop. “Be safe, Gwen Silver. I hope to see you when the winter becomes spring."