Chapter Twenty-Six

The journey after leaving Fayetteville was much smoother - Kinsley had switched to mostly instrumental music, guitars and synthesizers. They had pulled over a couple of times for a cuddle break on that second half of the drive. Kinsley would pull into a rest stop and unbuckle Bree, scooting the seat back and just holding her. She was thankful for those moments, the closeness that kept the panic away. Kinsley seemed to have an uncanny sense for when it was starting to bother her, offering comfort almost before Bree realized she was uncomfortable herself.

Bree didn't bother to ask Kinsley if she could use the bathroom. After the first rest stop, she felt the need... and she let go. The diaper grew warm and Bree found herself idly touching the plastic backing from time to time. In a strange way, it provided an unexpected comfort all its own. She knew that Kinsley would take care of her, that Kinsley would change her. She also knew that Kinsley would be cross with her for asking.

This is normal for you now.

Bree had never been to Raleigh, but she hated how crowded it felt. The roads felt denser, the buildings more imposing, even the trees felt too tall. She wanted more than anything to be in Kinsley's lap. But now that they were in Raleigh proper, those breaks just to cuddle were much less likely. The warmth in her diaper was fading, leaving it simply soggy. She tried not to look at the world around her, following Kinsley's suggestions and just relaxing, resting her eyes, listening to the music.

She didn't open her eyes again until the car stopped.

The towering, multi-storied brick buildings seemed to hunch over the streets, a dozen window-eyes glaring at her. Everything around her was unknown, and felt dangerous. This wasn't safe, and Bree wanted to get out of here, to get back to the familiar. This didn't look like a great neighborhood, the kind of place where you couldn't trust the cops or the locals - both were dangerous to queer folk unless they adopted you as the "neighborhood oddball". A soft whimper rose in her throat as the music ended, as Kinsley began climbing out of the car. She felt incredibly vulnerable in her barely concealed diaper, in a short dress that looked like it belonged on a toddler.

"Climb in the back." Kinsley's tone was clear, this wasn't a request. Bree scrambled, wondering if there was some danger she hadn't seen.

A yelp escaped her as the passenger door opened before she had gotten settled. She sat her butt down quickly with a crinkle and a squish, smoothing her skirt out and looking around.

At the woman with long, dirty brown hair who climbed into the passenger seat. Her black t-shirt was paint-stained, proclaiming "My people skills are just fine, it's my tolerance for idiots that needs work." The back door beside her opened shortly after, Kinsley hefting a duffel bag at Bree - who could only blink as she caught it.

"Thank you so much, Kins." Her accent was bizarre, high pitched and lilting. Bree expected her to end her sentence with Dontcha Know.

"Of course, sugar. You're a Doll, and that means you're family."

"Well it really means a lot to me. I mean, really. I had no idea that David was going to flip on me like that... " The woman, Jo, slumped in her seat, putting a hand over her face. "Maybe I'm not cut out to live in the 'real world', Kins. It keeps falling apart... "

"Josephine Elizabeth." Bree sat straight up at the tone. She knew that tone. But Kinsley wasn't even talking to her. The blonde reached over and buckled Jo's seatbelt, a stern look on her face. "Now you're just insulting me. You think I was wrong about you? That you can't make it?"

Bree couldn't help but notice that Jo had started sitting a little straighter as well. "No Kinsley... "

That tone. That chastised, sullen tone. Bree had heard it from Faith, from Lila, from her own lips. She watched as Kinsley leaned over, planting a soft kiss to Jo's forehead.

"Let's go home. You can stay with us while you get back on your feet again. I know you're ready for the world, my dear - but you're forgetting one of the lessons you learned."

Bree blinked, as visions of herself being moved to the cage permanently spiderwebbed across her brain. Of Jo getting her room, of her last vestiges of being human in the Dollhouse vanishing. She whimpered unconsciously, wanting nothing more than to be held in that moment.

Jo sounded unsure. "Perfect is the enemy of good?" She sat up as the car pulled back onto the road.

"Life is harder at the bottom." There was an edge to the words, a tightness that Bree didn't recognize. A piece of Kinsley she had yet to see. "At the bottom you have nothing, so what can you use to climb up? It's a lot easier to reach the top if you started in the middle. And the middle feels just as impossible to the bottom as the pinnacle does to the middle." Sabrina didn't miss the backwards glance that Kinsley shot her as they pulled into a gas station. "Peanut butter Snickers?"

"You remembered!" Jo laughed, a surprisingly musical sound, the clear tinkling of chimes in the wind. "Yes please!"

When Kinsley left the car, so did the remaining shreds of Bree's comfort.

"Sorry, I didn't introduce myself yet. I'm having a bit of a bad day, I hope you'll forgive me." Jo turned, facing Bree through the gap between the front seats. "I'm Jo. What's your name?"

"I'm Bree... " Sabrina looked down, not understanding why she felt scared of this new person. She seemed nice enough, her smile seemed kind... but looks could be deceiving. "Um, hi. I'm sorry that you're having a bad day."

Bree nearly jumped out of her skin at the gentle hand that rested on her knee. Jo's nails were ragged, chipped, her fingertips calloused.

"You're going to be okay. Everything is going to be okay. I'm scared too, but ultimately - I trust Kinsley."

Frozen, Bree sat there, unsure of what to do. Outside, Kinsley pumped gas before heading into the station. Jo never let go, never pressed, just rested her hand gently on Bree's leg, waiting. With effort, Bree made eye contact with Jo, looking into those guileless green eyes. She was being completely sincere. She was laying her cards on the table and showing her entire hand. Bree felt the fear that twisted her chest into knots relax, felt her anxiety slip away just a small amount.

"How long were you with the Dolls? How long ago did you leave?"

A sad smile showed itself on Jo's face. Calloused fingers gave the slightest squeeze to Bree's leg. "We'll talk about that all later. It's not my place right now. Just... it's gonna be okay. Okay?"

"Okay... "

"What's okay?" Kinsley asked, slipping back into the driver's seat. She tossed something at Jo, then at Bree, who fumbled it and had to recover the object from the floor.

A package of...

"Jerky?" She cocked her head to one side, confused.

Kinsley smiled knowingly, firing up the engine and pulling back onto the road.

"It's a great treat for pets." Jo said with a small laugh, shaking her head as she tore open the candy bar.

Sabrina's cheeks burned red as the old car rumbled down the road.

▲ ▲ ▲

The entire way to the theater, Lila insisted on having the music from the first Frozen on repeat. Some people found Lila's idiosyncrasies annoying, for Faith it was all just part of the girl's charm. Lila loved with her whole heart, and that love made the whole world seem brighter. Life hadn't always been kind, but the light that Lila shared made it all easier to bear.

She couldn't wipe the smile from her face as she pulled into the parking spot outside the theater, when it disappeared all at once.

Lila was going on a date. All alone. This wasn't the first time, far from it, but it had been a while. She pushed down her nervousness, not wanting Lila to sense it. Faith turned the radio down slowly.

"We're here, hun." She smiled over at her bouncy passenger, a strange mix of hopefulness and fear in her heart. Could Lila find someone as wonderful as Angela?

Not possible, Faith mused. No way two women that perfect exist in the world.

But she could hope that this Mallory could see what an incredible gift Lila was, her capacity for love. Leaning over, she gave Lila a kiss on the cheek.

"Have a good date. Text me when you want me to pick you up and I'm there."

"Oh I know." Lila's smile was matter-of-fact, like the concept of Faith doing anything to let her down was completely alien, akin to Faith suggesting that she continue breathing oxygen - just in case. "And how could the date be bad? I'm cute, she's beautiful and looks very cuddly, and it's Frozen! Tonight is going to be amazing."

And just like that, Lila was gone, off on her adventure. Out of Faith's range to protect her from a world that wasn't always ready for her peculiar color of light. Lila was ultraviolet, off the visible spectrum, and only a few people could seem to really understand how beautiful that was.

With a wry smirk, her thoughts turned to Bree, wondering if she was ever that stubborn herself, wondering how long it would take the girl to open her eyes.

She reached over into the console, swiping her phone to life.

Faith: How is your commission going?

Slowly, Faith put the car into reverse - Ange was busy, it might take her a while to respond - she drove the car away from the theater... to the other end of the parking lot, out of sight. Best case, she just wasted time watching dumb videos and texting with the most perfect woman in the world. Worst case, she got an early text from Lila because this Mallory just wasn't ready.

But she hoped for dumb videos and texting.

My Perfect Girl: One done, one to go. This one is going to be very challenging! It's a lolita commission, lots of pintucks and some skirt tiers!

My Perfect Girl: But I'm more curious

My Perfect Girl: On whether the driver's seat of the car needs cleaned

Instant butterflies. Faith had no resistance to give today, and she instantly felt about three feet tall, like she didn't belong in that driver's seat at all.

Faith: It's clean!

My Perfect Girl: So you only wet it? Send me a picture of your diaper right now.

The world was spinning, and Faith was caught in the whirlwind. She could feel the heat in her cheeks.

Faith: I didn't wear one X_X

Faith: I'm big!

My Perfect Girl: Oh I know you're such a big girl, sweetie

My Perfect Girl: And I'm proud of you for always trying

My Perfect Girl: But I think we should play it safe

My Perfect Girl: And keep you diapered

My Perfect Girl: All the time

Faith had fumbled to type a reply twice already, but Mommy's messages kept coming. Every new line, every new tease, drove her further and further into that blushy place. The place where Mommy had absolute control.

Faith: Mommmyyyyyyyyyyyyy

My Perfect Girl: Should we put you in the cute pony diapers or the pink princess ones?

Mommy could see right through her. Like she had no defenses. Like she had the keys to every lock in Faith's brain. Faith texted back in a frenzy.

Faith: No the pony ones r 2 thick!!!!!!!!!

My Perfect Girl: Maybe I'll put you in both of them then and just keep you double diapered for a weekend

My Perfect Girl: Maybe I'll decide you're too little to talk

My Perfect Girl: And all you'll be allowed to do

My Perfect Girl: Is make those cute little squeaks and whimpers that you do

Love had many ways and many faces, and as Faith swam in Angie's affection, a part of her mind silently thanked Lila and Kinsley for the gifts they had given her.