Kent's point of view

"I can see it."

"Yeah, Cliff?"

"Yeah, Kent. I can. I totally get all those internet stories about them."

We both take a glance at our boys as they take turns slapping each other around playfully. The specific dynamic Cliff and I have with them is so sweet it makes my teeth rot. We, two seasoned, battered, veteran punk rockers are the mentors and stand-in protective parents for these young kids running head-first into the slimy, seedy, scary music industry. Watching them just enjoy the fleeting moments of young adulthood before the end of their development really makes me realize why normies want to have kids in the first place. I just want to protect them and keep them in this perfect innocent state for as long as I can... Jei especially.

"You ever read any of them" I ask.

"Totally. Most of the crew has, if I'm being honest. It's The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows and doesn't really bring up. We just accept it and move on" he responds with a nervous chuckle.

"Veeery clever, Jesse Lacey. I guess it wasn't until I read them I said Okay, I Believe You, But My Tommy Gun Don't."

We both snicker at our awful puns, realizing that even in our late twenties, we still easily fit into what the media called 'emo kids'. The band absolutely fit this mold and their fans followed suit, but I haven't seen many of us roadies in the background adopt the fashion, just the attitude mostly.

As the group got all fixed up for their meet-and-greet session, Cliff and I slid into their places on the couch as the door shut behind them. My day was nowhere near over yet, as I still had to pack up Jei's bass rig and help strike the stage, but I allowed myself this moment of respite.

Pulling the strings of my hoodie taught to block out the fluorescent lights, I sat enjoying the silence, still thinking about the fans, their stories, their feelings... and I can't help but feel…jealous...? Is that what this feeling is? Anger, maybe? Anger plus jealousy? Who knows...

Clearly, I have no problem with the notion of Jei getting paired up with another boy. Neither of us are exactly straight, but I guess I'm taking issue with who he's getting paired up with. Not just with his band-mates, the fans, or literally anyone in particular; I guess I have a problem with him getting paired up with anyone but me.

I shove this uncomfortable thought out of my head, as I feel it might be the beginning stages of possessiveness; not exactly a good look. Even more-so, I expel the terrible thoughts of Jei falling for someone who wouldn't treat him the way he needs to be treated, who wouldn't take the time to understand his intricacies, who would hurt him...

I doze off, thinking at least an hour could be good for me. Strike isn't technically for a little while and Jei's rig is light enough to tear it all down in no time at all. Time to get everything off my mind...

___________________________________________________

"Hey..? Hey, are you awake?"

I hear a muffled voice speaking to me. My body feels like it weighs at least a thousand pounds in this sleepy haze.

"Huh...? What? Who's there?" I ask into the cloudy void.

I hear a childlike giggle.

"It's me, silly! Who else would it be?"

I force myself to sit upright as the fog begins to clear. Before me is a newspaper full of gibberish text that I just can't decipher. I look around briefly to see a table with a coffee mug to my right, and a plate of toast and scrambled eggs to my left.

"Ah, right. I'm sorry, kiddo. Must've dosed off."

Another juvenile laugh. This time it's starting to sound familiar. All I can think of is how I still need to get my tie all situated and still pull into work on time, while getting this squirt ready for the day.

"You're so silly, daddy!"

"No, you!" I retort, playfully.

Ah, yes. I remember now! This is my place, my job, my kid, my life. This is all I know and will ever live until I retire in another twenty years or so. It doesn't look like my partner is present... maybe he left for the gym already? Somehow, I can't seem to shake the feeling that this isn't right, but a glance at my degrees on the wall tell me otherwise.

"What are you doing in school today, kiddo?"

"Teacher is learning us musics today!" I hear a small voice announce excitedly.

"Your teacher is teaching you music today, you say?"

"Mhmm!"

"And are you still dry, mister?"

A long pause falls betwixt us before I hear a sheepish "I dunno..."

"Rough night, sounds like, kiddo?"

"Yeah..."

I fold my paper down and begin to stand up, taking my now empty plate with me to the sink. As I start to turn around, I say "Well then, let's get you all--"

What the hell...?

Staring back at me is... Jei? Not even a kid Jei, just straight-up 'adult' Jei sitting at the table with his food on one of those divider plates you give to little kids and a sippy cup.

"Daddy? What's wrong?"

I drop the plate on the floor, sharp chunks splintering across the linoleum. My mouth falls open as I simply stare at my friend, my mentee, my... boss.

"Da......daddy...?"

I look down again and find myself in the clothes I fell asleep in, laying on the couch I stretched out on, and Cliff jostling my shoulders as I feel like I'm being violently pulled from my dream.

"Dude, DUDE? You okay, man?"

"WHAT, what... what...?" I sputter, inhaling sharply.

"Kent, you were twitching around and chuffing pretty bad in your sleep. Is everything cool? Bad dream?"

"Yeah... yeah... Just a... yeah, a bad dream."

"Had me worried, asshole!" Cliff replies, chuckling and rustling my hair and walking towards the door.

I check my watch to see if it's time to load up; it was almost exactly an hour, hell yeah. What the hell was with that dream though? Why was Jei... why was I... with the plate, and the sippy cup, and the... diaper...? And the "Daddy"?

I shake away the thoughts as I rub the sleep crusties out of my eyes. Time to get back to work before I actually call it a night. Loosening the ties on my hoodie, I remove the hood as I re-enter my 'work mode', strutting out onto the stage as the rest of the crew is working on striking the gear.

I always work with the lightest stuff first and save the heaviest for last when I can usually get an extra hand if I need it. I load up Jei's basses, his rack unit, his pedals, and my workbench into the bus's cargo bay. The only thing left are the Twin Behemoths... his two 8x10 bass amp cabinets.

"Hey K, we're all done over here. You need any help before we turn in?" Cliff calls from the other side of the stage near the loading door.

"Nah, I got it! Just leave the doors open for me!" I respond.

Okay. Plant my feet on the ground at shoulder width, bend my knees, take a firm hold and... LIFT. I get one cab hoisted up enough to scurry to the bus and practically heave it in; just one left before I can crash, let's do this.

Returning to the now empty stage (save for the drum riser the last cab was pushed up against), I latch onto the handles and start to bend down when I hear something jostling around in the shell. I set it back down, perhaps a little rougher than I should, and as soon as the cabinet connects with the ground, a one-foot by one-foot section of the back's wood falls out, spilling all of the... oh no...

I hastily try to jam all of this back into the cab as I whip my head around, checking if anyone noticed. Only one soul bore witness to my discovery, fortunately.

Unfortunately, however, it was Jei.