10- in her carmine/ mouth

“Can’t believe you talked me into this bullshit.” Scarlet, exasperated, pouted incredulously from the front seat of Emilia’s luxury coupe. The smooth ride helped calm her racing heart, but each turn made her stomach roll, and her diapered bottom crinkle in response.

“I’m quite confident that you hate this less than you say.” Emilia’s smug smile and glowing eyes never left the road.

Scarlet wasn’t sure if she could take one of her new girlfriend’s signature smirks right now. “I believe you when you say you won’t let anything unsafe happen. But I can still be nervous, right?”

They made another turn in downtown Caulfield Valley, away from her apartment. Scarlet had done a Walk of Shame or two before in her life, but none where her diapered bottom was barely covered by the oversized tee and her tights from the night before. She’d asked for a pit stop, both for a new skirt and her medications for the day, to which Emilia had obliged happily on their way for some groceries.

“Just relax.” Emilia’s even tone helped to soothe Scarlet’s racing thoughts. “Let yourself enjoy it.”

That was easier said than done, Scarlet’s mind still buzzed as she fought her growing central anxiety. She was pouring over their agreement from earlier with her phone. For the millionth time, she studied it, considering each of the intricacies. The legal-ish phrasing made her smile despite herself. Emilia couldn’t help but be a lawyer. She already had a few loopholes and considerations for updates. That could wait for the future however. Instead, she decided to voice her current concern.

“You don’t expect this kind of thing at work, right? Or all the time? Like we came up with that so—”

“No, I do not, dear.” Emilia interjected. “That rule is so that we get work done and you don’t have to call me Mommy in front of clients.”

Scarlet wanted to continue, but instead the car pulled into their destination, an upscale grocery chain nearer to Scarlet’s than Emilia’s home. Scarlet whined and tugged her skirt lower, finally giving up on any of her usual high waisted styling if it meant the cursed disposable diaper was more covered.

Emilia opened her door for her, and took Scarlet on her arm as she had on their date, with the younger woman hanging on to her like her life depended on it. They entered, the air of overpriced luxuries immediately hitting Scarlet, making her only cling to Emilia tighter. The markup on even something as simple as the bakery by the door made her double take, but she tried not to gawk as Emilia led her around. Her diaper crinkled softly with each step, but, as Emilia had assured, was impossible for others to hear between the generic loudspeaker music, inane socializing, and her own tights.

Scarlet’s eyes nervously scanned, shot to every fellow patron they passed, eyeing them up and down, gauging their reaction. How the fuck did I ever let myself get talked into this. Stupid, horny brain.

She kept waiting for one of the overdressed, designer-labeled residents of the nicer part of town to start pointing and laughing at her. It had been years since she had been so self-conscious in public. It was taking her back to her first few outings after transitioning, when she had felt like a gangly eyesore in poorly styled clothes that didn’t fit, rather than the young woman she became.

She blinked, and Emilia had already taken a basket and had loaded up the beginnings of a lunch of stir fry veggies, as well as snacks for Scarlet’s relatively meatless diet. She gave a small look up to the taller woman, pleading eyes full with nerves, and mouthed a small ‘thank you’ as they went. Emilia had been more than gracious. A small package of hummus, carrots, instant soups, and other quick and ready snacks would be stocked for her visits. Scarlet gave a quick squeeze of her girlfriend’s arm to try and show further gratitude.

Emilia merely returned a soft smile at the gesture, her understanding of the woman’s nervousness all over her face.

“This sight is quite a change from all that spunk yesterday. I rather like a quiet, shy babygirl on my arm to match the one that made me wait on purpose,” Emilia whispered back, giggling to herself.

Before Scarlet could plead with her to be quiet, she realized where she had been leading them. Her eyes, alternatingly locked on her feet or on Emilia’s face, caught the brightly colored packaging of Baby Diapers. They finished turning a corner and Scarlet too was greeted with the soft scent she was all too familiar with lately, baby powder. Infant care. Huggies and Pampers lined the walls, and simple soft toys joined them before giving way to bottles and baby food.

“Mommy!!” Scarlet whined with a whispered hiss.

“Hush, we only need a few things and then we can be done.”

Her heart pounded as they approached the baby diapers, a new, almost sinister air about them with their shared secret on her mind. Scarlet was suddenly concerned as to how she looked, a grown woman desperately clinging, but unsure if the lost puppy look she’d adopt following behind Emilia was much better. She had been in more than one relationship where she and a girlfriend had clung to each other like this so quickly, and she’d never even considered how she looked then. It was normal, typical even, for sapphics to move quickly.

Thankfully Emilia led her past them, stopping near the bottles. She spoke, derailing Scarlet’s anxious train of thought.

“I need you to pick the ones you like,” She gestured, still speaking softly as other patrons passed. Of course none of them paid the couple any mind, but Scarlet was sure everyone and their mothers knew why her cheeks were turning red.

“What?!”

“Pick a set of utensils and a cup you like, dear. I want you to be happy with them, else I would risk picking myself.” Emilia’s confidence was astounding, as if they were the only two people in the world.

Scarlet’s eyes scanned, her heart pounding. Just get it over with. That’s all, then you can leave.

She settled on a pink and purple set of plastic utensils, ridges on their handles to aid developing hand muscles with much less dexterity. A maroon red sippy cup came quickly after, almost matching the spoons and forks, but not quite. Scarlet tossed the two packages into the basket roughly, even more certain everyone in the store knew why they were buying them.

Emilia only giggled, and added a pack of baby wipes, powder, and baby oil to the basket.

“There, you survived. We can go, dear.” Emilia offered her arm again, Scarlet not even realizing she hadn’t returned to it. When Scarlet hadn’t relaxed by the time they were deep in the checkout line, Emilia gave her another knowing look.

“Relax, baby. Talk me through it.” Her kind eyes almost helped, but Scarlet couldn’t help but feel the malicious, sadistic joy behind them at her discomfort.

“I don’t exactly wanna talk right now. I just wanna be done, Emilia.” She tried to keep her tone even and her voice down, but the din of chatter and the beeping of registers easily covered it.

“I thought we said you would use titles?”

“We’re in public!” Scarlet whined indignantly before covering her mouth and looking around. She’d managed to not draw attention this time.

“And the more of a fuss you make, the more likely you are to draw attention. I’ve asked twice now.” The warning was clear this time.

“...I’m anxious and wanna be done…” The anxiety in her voice almost took over her brain, paralyzed until a solution came, “Emms.”

Emilia’s eyes softened further, laughing at the nickname. “Emms?”

“You didn’t say it had to be…you know…” Scarlet explained.

“You have rules for two hours and you already pull the technicality card.” Emilia tsked with feigned disappointment. Or what at least appeared to be feigned disappointment.

Scarlet pulled her trump card, a discrepancy she’d noticed before they left in her so-called rules.

“I don’t have a rule where I’m obligated to obey, you know. Even I know that’s in those stupid Fifty Shades books.”

Emilia stood there, stunned for a moment, not even advancing as the line moved in front of them.

“Scarlet, it’s a contract. Obviously, that should be a given.”

Inspiration struck the anxious woman. Desperate for a laugh, she let her mouth run anyway.

“And which of us is the lawyer and Expert Domme here?” Scarlet couldn’t help but to giggle at the death glare Emilia gave her.

“Watch it, missy. We’ll rectify that later. Until then, promise me no more technicalities? Both the letter and the spirit of the law, understood?”

“Okay…” Of course she wanted to listen, it had already proven to be fun. Yet, something nagged at the back of her mind, and it took a moment to identify.

She’s so cool and collected normally, or at least projects that way. The only time she isn’t is when we’re fucking and i’m doing a good job. She smiled to herself momentarily, then remembered where she was, shunning the memory of Emilia’s white knuckles and flushed face.

She saw Emilia roll her eyes and smile, her girlfriend likely still focused on their rules. But that was fun too? That isn’t the same *kind* of reaction. Is it just that I like getting reactions out of her? Scarlet returned to reality as the line moved up and their items were placed on the belt.

Scarlet again silently panicked as they checked out, the cashier a woman not much older than her. How could she not know? What would two women our age need with those? Her mind raced as the woman scanned and bagged, eying Scarlet a few times. She swore her heart would explode out of her chest as she finally stopped, gave Emilia the total, and turned to speak to Scarlet.

“You know, I just LOVE your hair. Your curls are beautiful.”

Oh.

Scarlet’s tension immediately dropped. It wasn’t as if she was complimented everywhere she went, but the red-brown curls were the first line from every date, stranger, and acquaintance who felt like breaking tensions. She’d had the exact conversation that was about to take place one million times, and the returning mask helped relieve her tension.

“Oh, thank you so much,” she’d say, making sure to appear humble. “They’re a ton of work, I feel like I spend more than my rent on them!” Cue canned laughter from everyone involved.

“Mine used to be that curly too, ya know.” They all said some variation.

“There’s a ton of products these days that are much better for them. Videos and stuff about what works and what doesn’t, how to use them. That’s how I learned.” She sincerely wanted to be helpful, but the rehearsed, reflexive nature of the state made her worry she came off as robotic.

“Oh really? I’ll have to try to look that up! Thanks for the info.” They were always polite. It was like she’d just told them how to take off the lead shoes they wore.

“Of course. Have a good one!” Conversation disengaged. Nerves reset. Emilia had already paid. Grab the grocery bags and walk away.

Emilia gave her a surprised smile and followed behind. It took her a moment to catch up, Scarlet’s eyes in a thousand yard stare beyond the sliding doors and past the parking lot.

“Scarlet?” Emilia’s curiosity tilted the song in her voice, and it made Scarlet blink back to reality.

Her eyes refocused, and she stopped, realized she stood in the middle of the street, then took her girlfriend’s hand as they resumed walking. “Sorry?”

“That was certainly something. You were shaking like a leaf just a moment before and then you…?” Emilia was fishing for Scarlet to incriminate herself.

“I just really wanted out of there, I think.” She lied. The mask was a reprieve, dunking your head in a cool bucket on a scorching day, and she didn’t want to get into it.

How could she sound like a sane person, let alone a sexy coquette if she had to go into all that?

“How are you feeling? I haven’t seen you shut down like that.”

Damn.

“Emilia, it’s okay. Just…overwhelmed. Noise and people and nerves and adrenaline,” she floundered, wanting to give just enough to not be pushed further.

“Too much?” Her voice was between suspicion and concern, “did you need to say red?”

Emilia’s tone became taught strings, ready to snap in anticipation.

“No.” By now they’d reached the car, and Scarlet’s nerves had returned. “I can take it,” she added, hoping to placate any suspicions. “Like you said, just let myself enjoy it. You’re not putting me in danger.

Emilia smiled, and leaned over to give her a kiss. Their tender lips met, and it quelled Scarlet’s fears.

Almost.

***

After enough pleading, Emilia finally relented from her refrain of ‘you are far too small to be chopping veggies’ to allow Scarlet to help with a stir fry lunch.

She was more than capable of handling a knife for something so menial, having cooked since her teenage years and more than a few poorly compensated restaurant jobs. Part of her almost wanted to be sitting on the couch, twiddling her thumbs and trying to feel ‘Little’—whatever that meant—rather than finely chopping mushrooms, carrots, onions, and bell peppers.

Even if she had allowed herself that, the other part of her overactive brain knew she’d just overclock and default to being anxious. It brought back too many self-conscious memories from childhood. A short stint with therapy had pointed out how many times she was made to feel like a difficult task to manage rather than something precious.

She shook her head to remove the thoughts, and decided to play a game. She thought back to the shopping trip and the loophole that she found.

“You’ve made stir fry before?” she started, not looking up at her partner.

“Of course! Fried rice is definitely a favorite. Why do you ask?”

“Just checking! I wasn’t sure. Should I double check the order you’re doing everything in?” She looked over her shoulder, Emilia was setting up a deep pan to cook from and their plates on the opposite side of the kitchen.

Her date’s eyes narrowed, tentatively approaching, sensing a trap was ready to be sprung. “How do you mean?”

“Well, you forgot to give me a rule to obey, if that’s the spirit of the rule, I just wanted to make sure you knew the first step of making rice is to boil water.” Scarlet laughed to herself as she finished chopping, and began cleaning the knife and left it to dry by the sink.

“Ohhhhh. So you want to talk to me like that, huh?” Scarlet was relieved as a playful smirk formed on Emilia’s face, and she approached menacingly.

The shorter woman giggled, then gasped, face turning red. A hand was groping her padded crotch.

“Hmm, not wet, yet.” Emilia whispered, a mocking giggle escaped as she could clearly feel Scarlet shiver at the touch. One of Emilia’s hands was holding up Scarlet’s skirt, and the other was gently rubbing her padded crotch with their long, piano-player fingers.

“I don’t do that!” Scarlet protested, pulling her skirt back down. Her voice was shrill and shaking, more from the sudden humiliating turn, rather than any actual offense. She looked back over her shoulder, checking Emilia’s reaction. She added a pleading eye, and a small “...Mommy,” to make her intent clear. Despite her heartbeat racing, she was playing along at the sudden humiliation.

God, she liked it. She hated the idea of actually pissing herself, of course. Any sane person would. But God did she love the tone Emilia used to imply otherwise.

“Aw, poor thing,” Emilia’s smirk surfaced again, and Scarlet felt her skin grow hot. “Your mouth is saying you’re much too big for diapers, yet your eyes say how much you’re liking this.”

Scarlet wanted to speak, but only gave a small whine as Emilia read her, an open book to be fingered through at her Domme’s leisure. She would’ve stayed silent too, were it not for Emilia’s hands moving to her padded bottom. Her eyes went wide as one hand gripped and lifted her skirt, and the other pulled her diaper’s waistband. The implication took a moment to sink in, and she wanted to squeal from under Emilia’s thumb.

“And still clean back here, as well. Good girl.”

Fuck.

“I told you I didn’t want to do that!” Scarlet was actually a bit offended now, a pout quickly forming on her blushing face. Emilia pressed into her back, breasts softly pushing into Scarlet as the strong arms wrapped around her middle. Her breath was hot on Scarlet’s neck.

Emilia what the fuck. That’s so gross it’s not even sexy! How could you say-

She didn’t need to say much. “Then why is my little girl’s heart racing like that?”

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. Retort. Reversal. Brain, please just fucking work!

She wanted to crawl in a hole and die rather than face Emilia’s implication, wanted nothing more than to cover her face with both hands and vanish from reality, erasing her entire existence. She hated it. Her mind raced.

“You’re soooooooo dedicated to humiliation that you’d literally deal with my shit, Emms?” Her mouth ran before her brain had even finished the comeback. Like she was watching as an outsider, she saw the response wash over Emilia. First, her amber-gold eyes flared with anger, only to be softened by the crackling of laughter across her face.

“Cheeky,” she finally spoke. Emilia squeezed Scarlet around the middle, releasing a giggling squeal from her. “I will break you of that, yet, Little One. Now, here.” Emilia kissed her temple, and took the chopped veggies from the cutting board they rested on.

Scarlet gave a small smile in response, and hopped up to sit on the counter as Emilia began pouring in the veggies with their fried rice.

The couple resumed their stir fry, the conversation moving on to new topics with just as much laughter.

Scarlet would rather die than admit she liked the embarrassment Emilia had given her. She still abhorred the idea of actually using the crinkling underwear she wore for its intended purpose. And yet the sensation of Emilia checking her, to make sure she was able to act like more than a helpless infant, had made her melt. Visions of the brunette in the video bounced in Scarlet’s head, still chained to the ceiling of a nursery as she pleaded, “Mommy! Mommy, please, no!”

Partners before now had made her excited, but not in the way Emilia was twisting and pulling all these knotted feelings inside Scarlet’s chest. The arousal from their play made Scarlet’s heart thump in double time, unable to relax if Emilia so much as made a vague notion of being assertive.

She loved it.

“You’re pretty cute sitting up there,” Emilia smiled, looking to Scarlet as she put the finishing touches on lunch. Delicious smells filled the kitchen, and Scarlet cracked the window behind her, letting in the beginning of her first bitter chill of east coast autumns to come. The aroma of soy sauce, fried rice, and every sauteed vegetable combined as they wafted out the newly opened window, away from Emilia’s pan, the portrait of an artist looking sexiest when they are at their craft.

“Yeah? I’ve been told I’m a pretty cute date before.” Scarlet smiled back resting her head in her hands as she gazed dreamily at her new girlfriend. Could it be called a honeymoon period if they weren’t even married?

“Just know you’re only to be up there with a clean diaper, understand?” Emilia laughed to herself as Scarlet’s squeals of irritation filled the kitchen.

She hated that she loved it.

Lunch was plated and served by Emilia, who expected Scarlet to do nothing to help but fill her new sippy cup with water or Emilia’s already opened oat milk. Scarlet decided to save herself some dignity and get water.

They were halfway through their plates when Emilia had changed the subject abruptly.

“So you asked about mine. I think I am quite entitled to ask about your sex life now.”

Scarlet almost choked on a mouthful of mushroom and fried rice, covering herself with a napkin to try and save face.

“Drink from your cup, dear. Mommy got it for you for just such a reason.” Emilia smirked and waited, watching as Scarlet took a red-faced suckle from her juvenile chalice.

“I-” Scarlet coughed again, “fine. I guess that’s fair.”

“So.” Emilia began, looking away to sip from her grown-up glass, “what I want to know is- Exactly how familiar you are with a strap?”

Scarlet scoffed at the line of questioning. “I feel like my performance speaks for itself.”

“In that you have sucked on plastic before, yes. That’s not quite what I’m asking.” Emilia’s eyes lit up, shining with barely restrained eagerness. “Do you take strap well?”

“Of course? Do I look like I don’t?” Scarlet gave another incredulous scoff and drank from her sippy cup again. It was becoming easier, and she could gesture without worrying about spilling, at least.

“You do, I just wanted to hear that you were proud to bottom.” Emilia finished her last bite and motioned to take Scarlet’s as well.

Red faced, Scarlet faced her burning cheeks away from Emilia and gently pushed the plate to Emilia.

“Yes, I receive more than I top, okay?” she finally admitted, watching as Emilia gave them another small portion for each.

“So with a relatively standard sized one, would you be used to taking that size?”

Scarlet somehow turned redder, thinking back to both the night before as well as the last time she and…her ex had been so inclined.

“It’s just been a minute. But yeah, that should be fine.”

“That hesitation is concerning,” Emilia mulled over a bite of fried rice.

“I’ve taken bigger and more, just…not all that recently. I’m not new to this. And standard isn’t that big, comparatively.”

“Do you ever orgasm from anal?”

“Wha-” Scarlet had to stop herself from gesturing wildly with a fork full of the last of the veggies. “You have the guts to ask something like that?” She huffed, before shyly adding, “yes, of course I have. Not only from anal, but yes.”

“None solely from prostate orgasms? I can certainly help with that.” Emilia’s devilish grin was out in full force.

“Cocky, much?”

“Quite confident I could get there. I am still working up to miracles, unfortunately, so perhaps not the first time.”

“I’d like to see you back that talk up.” Scarlet’s heart was racing at the thought, but urged her to call Emilia out.

Emilia merely raised an eyebrow before speaking. “Mouthy thing. I bet you will be begging, just like last night.”

“Was not.” Scarlet swallowed, hard.

“Oh? There is a bit of explicit photographic evidence to the contrary.”

Emilia had her there, after all. She couldn’t deny the photos of her in throws of passion, face clearly flustered as she tried to cum in a diaper. The thought made her smile for a moment remembering the fun, before completely hiding her face. Every thought merely spun in circles, unable to make her body move as she burned hot with embarrassment.

Emilia reached over, gently brushing her hair with one hand, nails gently scratching Scarlet’s scalp.

“I would like you to admit that you were hoping we’d go back up to my bedroom again today. I was hoping to tease you into it, not make you shut down completely.” Her voice was once again the familiar tones of envenomed honey, sending shivers down Scarlet’s spine. “So, can you do that for me?”

It took Scarlet a moment to even nod affirmative. She knew what Emilia’s response to a silent answer would be, and quickly added, “Yes, please, Mommy.”