(Rating: 3/5 (typical ABDL), CW: teasing, pants wetting, implied mental regression.)

As the Sun poked its radiant head above the horizon, Sophie was already at work, pulling cardboard crates out of her car’s trunk. She was middle-aged, out of shape, wore thick glasses and her unkempt auburn hair cascaded down her back. In the cold air of the vanishing night, she had wrapped herself in an unflattering sweater to keep warm. Her outfit and attitude could probably be described as the exact opposite of seductive. Not that she cared.

Today was yard sale day, and as she didn’t own a yard in the small city, she had booked a space for herself in the central parking lot. It was a great place for foot traffic - lots of opportunities to sell her random assortment of wares.

Once the half-dozen cardboard boxes were removed from her vehicle, she pulled up a foldable table and chair, as well as a garden umbrella. There might not be a lot of Sun right now, but if she had to stay sitting in one place all day, she’d rather be in the shade. In fact, if the day was bright enough, the shade freely provided would probably attract more customers.

Once her little setup was put on the reserved spot, she turned her attention back to the crates, only to find somebody rummaging through them.

“Hey! You could at least wait until I unpack!”

The snooping customer, an old lady whose wrinkles gave her a perpetual frown, didn’t even look up from the box as she replied: “You’re not the only booth I need to check before the crowd comes in, sunshine. Just let me do my job, will you?”

Eugh. An antique dealer. And a rude one at that. Why are they always the hardest customers to deal with…?

Refusing to give the old crone the satisfaction of getting upset, Sophie simply gathered the other boxes and brought them to the table one by one, unpacking the various tchotchkes stored within. She didn’t have the time to empty a full box before the antique dealer had joined her to rummage through another crate.

“Found anything you like?” ask the seller, a layer of irony covering her every word like a thick spread of peanut butter.

“No. Mostly junk,” replied the rude customer. “I was hoping for a unified set that I could buy in one go. But you’re just selling random stuff, like ninety percent of amateurs.”

The way she pronounced ‘amateur’ showed a profound disdain for the average yard sale enjoyer. Sophie took a deep breath, taking upon herself to not throw insults at her in retaliation.

It was at this moment that the antiques dealer pulled something out of the box which made her eyes light up. Sophie recognized the item: a porcelain doll, the “early-previous-century” kind of toy with a frilly dress, large hat and curly hair. The item was in a stunningly good shape for something that was probably older than the two women combined.

“This… could be interesting,” admitted the older woman.

“Something for your personal collection?” asked Sophie, a hint of mockery in her voice.

“Don’t be silly,” replied the antiques dealer with a snap. “I’ve long left behind the age of playing with dolls. I’m pretty sure even my grand-daughter is too old for that now. But there’s a market for this kind of collectibles, and I could easily find someone to buy a doll in such a pristine condition. How much?”

“The price is written on her soles, if I recall.”

The old woman lifted up one of the doll’s legs, and her eyebrows arched up. She let out a chuckle.

“Seriously? You really have no idea of the true value of things, don’t you?”

“Oh, I’m only an amateur, you know,” replied Sophie using the exact same tone as the old lady did. “I’ve never looked up any of that online.”

“I would be a fool to let a bargain like that slip by. I’m sure she will have found an owner by the end of the day!”

“Oh, no doubt about it,” replied Sophie with a strange smile as she accepted a bank note from the antique dealers. “Have a nice and productive yard sale, ma’am.” The old lady left without saying a word, absorbed in the contemplation of her new acquisition.

Now freed of this pesky customer, Sophie was free to unpack every single item in her boxes, sorting them carefully by theme and presenting them in the most flattering manner. Some items, she subtly put forward so they would be noticed first. Once her booth was set up, she sat in her folding chair and poured herself a cup of hot coffee from her thermos bottle.

The yard sale hadn’t even started yet, and she had already sold one of her hot items. Today was going to be a good day.

***

The crowd was slowly pouring into the parking lot. Early birds, still, those who had the courage to wake up extra early in search for treasures… but not as motivated as the antiques dealers, of course.

A handsome blond man, probably in his early thirties, was perusing Sophie’s wares with curiosity. He opened a binder she had left flat on the table and let out a gasp of surprise.

“Oh! You have Pokémon cards!”

“Eeyup,” replied Sophie casually, leaning back on her folding chair. “I think it’s an old collection I got from someone else, but I don’t really have any use for them. There are more in the tin box, if you’d like.”

“I used to be so much into this stuff when I was a kid,” continued the man as he flipped page after page of plastic-wrapped cards. “The original ones, I mean. They keep making new games, but they never reach the same heights as the first ones, you know?”

Sophie nodded and smiled. She knew better than to interrupt someone imparting useless knowledge upon her. If she pretended to care just enough, it might end up in a sale, after all.

“And I mean, what are those designs they’re doing nowadays? I feel like they ran out of ideas years ago!”

“I honestly can’t tell them apart myself,” she admitted. “Maybe it’s just your nostalgia talking?”

“Oh, no no, I can assure you, it’s very diff-” The man interrupted his train of thought as something in the binder caught his attention. “Oh my god, you got the holographic Blastoise?!”

“I do?” she replied candidly, straightening to look up the card the man was pointing at. “Oh yes, I guess that’s right. That’s a pretty one.”

“Blastoise was my favorite!” continued the man with increasing excitement. “I had the exact same card as a kid, first edition, before my mom threw my collection away when I went to college. It was my treasure! I can’t leave without it, even if it’s just for old time’s sake…”

He flipped a few more pages, his eyes growing wider and wider with each new flip. “Wait, you also have a holo Ninetales? And Gyarados? And- and Mewtwo??”

“Wow, looks like I got a great deal on that collection after all, and I didn’t even know about it!” replied Sophie with a polite laugh.

“I need them all! I need to - oh God, do you sell by the card? I don’t think I have enough cash to get every single one of them…”

Sophie made him an offer: “Look, you don’t have to select just a few. If you take the entire binder, I’ll throw the tin box in the deal at no extra charge. Does that seem fair to you?”

The man didn’t hesitate for a second before yelping: “Deal!”

He all but slapped the money in her hand and picked up his new treasure like he was afraid it would flap its covers like wings and fly away. As she handed him the change, her smile was positively Cheshire-esque. “Here you go! You should have enough cards to make yourself an old-school deck. I hope you’ll find someone to play with.”

“Oh, just you wait until my best friend hears about this! We’re going to play all night like it’s 1999 all over again!”

The smile didn’t leave Sophie’s face as she watched the man leave the parking lot in a hurry. She made someone happy today. Maybe two people, if she was lucky.

The more they grow up, the more they stay the same…

***

The day had now progressed enough that the parking lot was full of curious customers. Sophie greeted person after person, watched them peruse her wares, then leave with a sorry expression on their faces.

That’s alright. It’s part of the game. For every sale, you’re going to have two dozen people who are just window shopping. You already got two out, anyway.

A couple approached her table, a young woman and a much older gentleman. Sophie instinctively thought of them as father and daughter, but the way she was holding his arm and looking at him was off. A couple, then. May-December romance, probably.

While the man was perusing some books - which Sophie didn’t care about - the lady was looking curiously at a couple of packages on the floor, below the table.

“Excuse-me, but what are these exactly?” she asked while pointing at the packs.

“These? Let me check,” feigned Sophie. She knew exactly what they were, but she liked to put on a show. She pulled the square-shaped plastic bags from under the table and put them on her chair.

“Hmm… Ah, yes, those are adult incontinence briefs. Size M.”

“Adult incontinence…” mouthed the lady as she tried to understand the words. “Wait, do you mean diapers?”

“I guess you can call them that, yes!”

The young woman began snickering, which attracted the attention of her much older companion. “What’s so funny?” he asked.

“She’s selling diapers for adults,” she replied, cracking a laugh like she had just said the most hilarious joke. “Can you believe it? Who even needs these?”

“A surprisingly high number of people,” replied the gentleman with tact. “You might not be familiar with retirement homes, but I assure you, it’s nothing unusual.”

“Seriously? With little teddy bears and all?”

The man looked at the teddy bear covered disposable garments. “Huh… I must say, that’s the first time I’ve ever seen anything like these.”

Sophie shrugged. “Beats me. I couldn’t tell you about it, I don’t even remember where I got them. Still, are you interested?”

The lady’s laughter doubled in intensity. Between two fits of giggles, she told him: “Oh yes, please, get them! And then to go with the adult diapers, we’ll get you an adult teddy bear, and an adult stroller, and a…”

“That’s quite enough,” abruptly interrupted the man with a tone that left no doubts that she had gone too far.

Behind her table, Sophie pretended to not notice the sudden shift in tone. “I’ll give you the two packs for ten? That’s a deal you won’t get at any grocery store.”

“No, thank you,” coldly replied the now passably annoyed man. “No matter what she says, we don’t need these. Now come!”

The piqued gentleman pulled his girlfriend by the elbow, and they disappeared in the crowd.

Sophie was perplexed. She was almost sure she could have closed the sale with these two. She knew by experience that most people don’t notice the diapers unless they were already curious about them. It should have been easy, and yet, it didn’t turn out right.

She shrugged and put the diaper back under the table. Maybe she’ll find another customer for these. The yard sale was far from being over.

***

The hours stretched for what felt like an eternity, and Sophie was getting bored. While she had plenty of customers in the afternoon, most of them would only buy junk that she didn’t care about. She didn’t mind the money, of course, but it wasn’t what she was here for. Her hot items were seemingly unable to catch the eyes of anyone.

As she took a moment to get a bite out of her sandwich, a small family approached. A man and a woman, still young and beautiful, pushing a stroller where their months-old baby was currently asleep. They were smiling, even if the man clearly didn’t have enough sleep for a while, considering the bags under his eyes. A lovely little scene that wouldn’t feel out of place in a commercial for, say, life insurance policies.

It was the man whose eye was caught by one of Sophie’s items. “Look, Alexandra!” she said as he grabbed her wrist for attention. “The toy phone, I had the same one as a kid!”

“Aw, that’s just precious, honey,” she replied in a tired-but-willing-to-listen-to-another-ramble tone. (It’s a very noticeable tone once you’ve heard it a couple of times.)

The man with exhausted eyes reached for the item. A classic toy phone made of bright plastic, with a rotary dial and corded receiver, sporting two friendly eyes and a wide smile painted on the front. It also had wheels, for some reason.

“Does it still work?” he asked the seller.

Sophie swallowed her mouthful of ham and bread and replied: “Try it out for yourself!”

The man turned the dial, and the phone produced a lovely ringing bell sound. He rolled it back and forth, enjoying the toy’s rattle and jiggling eyes as he did. “Oh wow, that takes me back! They don’t make toys like these anymore.”

He turned towards his wife, who was patiently waiting behind him. “Hey, why don’t we take this for Junior? I’m sure he’ll love it!”

The woman’s polite expression switched to mildly pained as she replied: “Oh honey, don’t you think he’s a little young for that? He can’t even sit on his own yet.”

“But he will grow up! We’ve bought tons of stuff for when he’s older. It’s not like we have a cupboard full of clothes that are too big for him.”

“Right, but…” She was running out of arguments. “He’s never going to see a phone like that in his life, how much could he ever learn from it?”

“Not everything has to be about learning, Alex,” he countered as he rolled his eyes. “Toys should be about fun, first and foremost. Come oooonnnn, pleaaaase?”

She darted a defeated look at the old toy. “How much?”

Sophie showed the fingers of a single hand in response. That seemed like a reasonable offer for someone who was looking for any excuse to bail out of the deal. The woman sighed. “We’ll take it. Do you have a bag for it?”

“You’re the best!” exclaimed her husband as he gave her a peck on the cheek.

As she handed the money and waited for Sophie to wrap the toy phone up, she mused: “I swear, we have so many toys for the baby already. And they get bored of them so easily. I don’t know what we’re going to do with them!”

“In my experience,” chimed Sophie as she handed her the bag, “toys are there as a distraction. When you need a little time for yourself, for instance, you put them in front of a toy and it buys you a few minutes. Or if you need the big brother to focus on something while you take care of the younger one.”

“That sounds about right,” she replied with a small laugh. “I only have one child, however, so I’m not sure how applicable your advice will be.”

“Do you really?” She gave a subtle glance to the husband, who was lovingly looking over the stroller. “Well, in that case… Consider this as an investment for the future, then!”

She winked to the now slightly confused woman, and they all went their merry way. Sophie was high on cloud nine at the moment.

One more sold! And I know for a fact that this one is going to be loved to the fullest…

***

The day was drawing to a close. The crowd already got thinner, and Sophie had accepted that she would only make small, unimportant sales before the official end of the day. She was fine with that.

What she didn’t expect was to hear a familiar voice for a second time today. “Excuse me?”

She looked up to see the older gentleman and his young companion standing in front of her table. While he was still as posh and serious-faced as the first time, the woman certainly looked different. Gone was the laughing eyes and impertinent tone: she now looked distressed, shameful, on the verge of tears, even. Her whole body language screamed ‘I’m small and insignificant, please don’t look at me’.

“Do you still sell the… incontinence product from earlier?” inquired the gentleman.

“Sure do,” replied Sophie, trying her hardest to not show the excitement she was feeling inside. “Right there, haven’t moved since you went by earlier today.”

“We will take them, if you please.”

The young lady looked panicked and began to beg him: “Please, I'm so sorry, it was just an accident, I swear, we don’t have to…”

“I believed you said it would be two packs for ten?” continued the man without paying attention to her. “If you have any more than these, we’ll take them as well.”

“Please, don’t do this, I promise I’ll be good…” Her pleas fell into deaf ears.

“That’s all I have, I’m afraid, but the price is right!” continued Sophie. “Let me get them for you.”

As she leaned down to grab the two packs of diapers, Sophie earned a good look of what was really going on. Right between the woman’s legs, from her crotch down to her knees, the fabric of her jeans was a lot darker than the rest of her trousers. Suspiciously darker. It outlined a certain shape from top to bottom that wasn’t too different from a waterfall. There was only one explanation possible for this, and it wasn’t ‘I tipped my drink over and it fell on my lap’.

Deep inside, Sophie was ecstatic. She composed her face into a neutral mask as she rose above the table with the two packs of teddy bear adorned adult diapers. The couple was having an argument, or rather, one side was chewing the other one.

“I will not hear a single word of it!” declared the man, his voice raised louder than Sophie had ever heard him before. “You have been such an embarrassment today. Not only did you mock and belittle people, but then you’re making a mess of yourself and trying to pass it out as not a big thing? No, I won’t allow it. It’s time you learned a lesson, young lady. Now keep it quiet until we’re home, or I’ll make it even worse for you. Am I being clear?”

Sophie could only look at them in silence, awkward at the sight of the argument. The man grabbed the packs of diapers, giving one to his girlfriend to hold, then dropped a bill on the table. He then said, in his usual soft tone of voice: “Thank you for your help, madam, and have a good evening”.

The two left abruptly, the lady holding back tears as she walked, unable to hide her shame with what they were both holding in their arms. Sophie followed their walk until they disappeared out of her sight.

Damn… That was awkward. I don’t usually get to see scenes like this. Still, my intuition was right about the diapers and these two. I guess I’m starting to see patterns after all this time…

***

And just like that, the yard sale ended. The last few customers were leaving as the shopkeepers packed their stuff up, ready to leave as soon as the coast was clear. Sophie was among them, shoving miscellaneous items into cardboard boxes without caring to sort them.

Four items in a day… That might be a new personal best. Now we’ll just have to wait and see how many will take the bait.

It only took her a few minutes for the crates, table, chair and umbrella to find their place in her car. She slammed the trunk close, officially ending her work day.

She then removed her ugly sweater. And her glasses. And her wig. Her body language changed almost immediately to someone less awkward, more confident. In just a few moments, she looked like a completely different person.

God, pretending to be some unassuming dork is always so exhausting! But you gotta do what you gotta do.

She was about to get into her car when her cellphone rang. Unknown number. She casually picked up the call, and her voice was a far cry from the way she had talked all day.

“Hello? Yes. Yes, that's me. How can help you? … Oh dear. … Oh my. Really? When did that happen? Today? I’m so sorry to hear that, miss. But don’t you worry, you’ve called the right number for this situation.”

She leaned against her car, preparing herself for a different kind of sales pitch.

“Have you read my website yet? I assume this is where you found my phone number… I understand, you were in a hurry. When we’re done with this call, I advise you to read the FAQ page, it will answer most of your questions. The first thing you need to know is that spontaneous regression is a perfectly normal thing. I understand that it is very sudden and probably upsetting, but we can deal with this together.”

“Can you tell where you live…? Oh, you’re in luck, I’m not that far away, I was just coming back home after a visit to another customer.” That one was a lie. She’d rather not tell the woman on the phone what she had actually been doing today.

“I’ll be there in about half an hour, then. I will bring you some emergency supplies for him: clothes, diapers, that kind of thing. … Yes of course I have those handy, that’s my job! When we meet, we’ll deal with the situation at hand and I’ll teach you the basics. Trust me, they might be a lot bigger, but they’re still just like babies: all they need is food, clean diapers, toys and plenty of love! The first session will be free of charge. After that, we’ll discuss if you wish to hire me for further help. Does that sound good to you? Yes? Alright, I’ll see you then. Bye!”

She terminated the call. It’s a good thing that there were so few people left in the parking lot, because Sophie’s smile was positively wicked.

Sophie, if that was her real name, was a professional “adult babysitter”. She specialized in taking care of adult babies, a job she enjoyed a lot more than when she had to take care of actual babies. There was a lot less competition in this line of work, too. All she had to do was hang around and wait for someone to turn into a drooling adult baby. It happened a lot more than you’d think at first glance.

But sometimes, when business was slow and all her charges started to grow up again in their head, she was not above forcing the hand of fate. Just a bit. Over her years as a specialized nanny, she learned to identify some items which had a tendency to… say, cause a few regression events. Nostalgic toys, cursed VHS tapes, oversized baby paraphernalia, that kind of thing.

Put the right item in the right hands, and boom! You suddenly have a giant baby needing her care. Which was good for business. For her business, specifically. Over the years, she had not found a better way to distribute these regression traps than yard sales, garage sales and other discount outlets. Wear a disguise to not be found out, hide the regressive items among other random stuff, sell them for cheap, and the suckers presented themselves. Worked like a charm.

Giddy at the perspective of having found a new customer, she slipped into her car, ready to meet a new charge.

I wonder which one it is? The voice on the phone was a woman, but I’m not sure it was the young mother from that cute couple... Maybe it’s the card guy. Or someone else entirely? Those traps are fickle and hit when you least expect them to do.

Before she could turn the engine on, her phone rang again. Unknown number, a different one. She let go of the ignition and picked up the call.

“Hello? Yes, this is Sophie speaking.” She immediately recognized the voice of the older gentleman from earlier, and she listened to him speak for a long moment without interrupting.

“I see you’ve read my website,” she finally replied. “Well, I'm currently on my way to another charge, but if you’d like, I can come to your place later tonight. Would that be okay? Should I bring supplies to take care of your girl as well? … Oh, you already got diapers? That’s lucky! I guess I should just bring clothes, then. … No? If you prefer it that way, I won’t insist, sir. Make sure your thermostat is set high enough so she doesn’t catch a cold!”

She let out a laugh. Even her laugh sounded different from when she was playing the clueless yard seller behind her foldable table.

“Right, I’ll see you in a few hours then, and then we can discuss our further partnership. Sorry, come again? … Full care you say? Are you sure? I would hate to sell you a package that you won’t…” She listened in silence for a moment. “No, no, I perfectly understand, sir. No problem. I’m sure that we will find a way to raise her right, this time. Thank you for your trust in my abilities, sir. I’ll see you then.”

She hung up, not believing what she had heard. Not only did she find herself two new clients today, but one of them was immediately aiming for the most expensive contract? And judging by what he said on the phone, it was going to be a fun one to take care of.

This had to be one of her most lucrative yard sales yet. Four items sold, and two new customers in just one day? She hit the jackpot! As she started up the car, she found herself dreaming of getting a third regressed adult to cap off that beautiful day…

Well, except for that old hag from this morning. She can play with that doll all on her own, for all I care!